So far so good; but in
the name of common sense let some experienced practitioner in the art of
"cutting for the simples" be furnished with a correct list of the awful
asses he has cozened at "hood-man blind;" and pray Heaven they may each
and severally be operated on with all convenient speed!
* * * * *
"SLUMBER, MY DARLING."
During the vacation, the Judges' bench in each of the Courts at
Westminster Hall has been furnished with luxurious air-cushions, and
heated with the warm-air apparatus. Baron Parke declares that the Bench is
now really a snug berth,--and, during one of Sergeant Bompas's long
speeches, a most desirable place for taking
[Illustration: A SOUND NAP.]
* * * * *
A FAMILIAR EPISTLE
FROM
JOHN STUMP, ESQ., POET LAUREATE TO THE BOROUGH OF GRUB-CUM-GUZZLE,
TO
SIMON NIBB, ESQ., COMMON-COUNCIL-MAN OF THE SAID BOROUGH,
_Setting forth a notable Plan for the better management of_
RAILWAY DIRECTORS.
DEAR SIMON,
If I were a Parliament man,
I'd make a long speech, and I'd bring in a plan,
And prevail on the House to support a new clause
In the very first chapter of Criminal Laws!
But, to guard against getting too nervous or low
(For my speech you're aware would be then a no-go),
I'd attack, ere I went, some two bottles of Sherry,
And chaunt all the way Row di-dow di-down-derry![1]
Then having arrived (just to drive down the phlegm),
I'd clear out my throat and pronounce a loud "Hem!"
(So th' appearance of summer's preceded by swallows,)
Make my bow to the House, and address it as follows:--
"Mr.
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