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Various

"Punch, or the London Charivari, Volume 100, January 31, 1891"


(_IMITATION SAPPHICS SOME WAY AFTER CANNING AND FRERE._)
[Illustration: _Wordy Knife-Grinder_. "STORY! GOD BLESS YOU! I HAVE
NONE TO TELL, SIR!"]
_Friend of Ireland_:--
"Wordy Knife-Grinder! Whither are you going?
Dark is your way--your wheel looks out of order--
Mitchelstown palls, and there seems no more spell in
O'BRIEN's breeches!
"Wordy Knife-Grinder, little think the proud ones,
Who in their speeches prate about their Union-
Ism, what hard work 'tis to keep a Party
Tightly together!
"Tell me, Knife-Grinder, what _your_ little game is.
Do you mean playing straight with me and others?
Or would you jocky Erin like a confounded
Saxon attorney?
"Give us a glimpse of that same Memorandum!
Pledge yourself clear to what needs no explaining!
Prove that your plan is not quite a sham, sly-whittled
Down into nullity!
"Ere I depart (if go I must, TIM HEALY)
Give me a pledge that I'm not sold for nothing.
Tell us in plain round words, without evasion, the
_True_ Hawarden story."
_Knife-Grinder_.
"Story! God bless yer! I have none to tell, Sir!
_Never_ tell stories, I; 'tis my sole business
This Wheel to turn with treadle and cry, 'Knives and
Scissors to grind O!'
"Constabulary? Question of Land Purchase?
Number of Irish Members due in justice?
Never said aught about 'em; don't intend to--
Not for the present.


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